Premature Ejaculation Is Ruining My Life

Premature ejaculation is every man’s nightmare because it has a profound effect on their lives. For some, it is just something that happens rarely while for others it is a recurring problem. Relationships suffer due to frustration, boredom and lack of intimacy. Sexual relations become non-existent because each session results in dissatisfaction.

Medically the definition of premature ejaculation is ejaculation occurring within 90 minutes of intercourse. Generally, men believe they have the condition if intercourse finishes quicker than they expect. There are two types of premature ejaculation, primary and secondary.  Primary PE is a lifetime condition that starts in teenage years.  Secondary PE usually happens unexpectedly after many years of successful intercourse.

There are many different reasons why men suffer from premature ejaculation including; physical, psychological and drug use.  Treatments vary from practical exercises to controlling orgasms, talk therapy and antidepressant medication.  Premature ejaculation has such a major impact on a man’s life that it feels as if it is ruining it.

Causes Of Premature Ejaculation

There is no specific cause of premature ejaculation although there are many different reasons why a man may suffer from it.  Possible causes include; stress, guilt, anxiety, hormone imbalance, drinking, drugs, smoking, health issues and lack of control.  There are two types of premature ejaculation primary and secondary.  

Primary PE normally starts during teenage years and is often attributed to upbringing. Guilt plays a huge part in this version of the condition as teenage boys may get into the habit of masturbating quickly to avoid discovery.  A bad sexual experience may also trigger premature ejaculation.  Rushing to climax becomes a bad habit that is difficult to overcome resulting in lifelong premature ejaculation. A very sensitive penis also results in climaxing too soon.

Secondary PE is normally due to lifestyle choices and difficult circumstances.  Men who have this type of premature ejaculation have had a successful sex life in the past.  New relationships can trigger PE simply because it is exciting and new.  Stress at work, recreational drugs and alcohol are also causes.  Treating this version of PE is easier because it is likely to be a one-off event.

Treatment

There are a variety of ways to treat premature ejaculation many of them focusing on learning how to control ejaculation.  

Masturbating beforehand often delays orgasm so that PE is less likely to occur during intercourse.  Desensitizing the penis with a thick condom also delays ejaculation because the penis is less responsive.  Men can stop the ejaculation reflex by taking a deep breath just before climaxing and prolong intercourse.  Sexual positions that make the penis less sensitive also delay orgasm.  Reduce excitement by thinking about the washing up or putting the bin bags out.

Men can train themselves to delay their climax by doing exercises that help them to recognise when they are about to come.  Understanding how their body works gives men control over their orgasm and eventually delays it. These methods are particularly useful if PE is due to conditioning and a negative attitude to sex.

Premature ejaculation affects both people in the relationship so it is important that couples work together to sort it out.  Couples therapy deals with issues that may arise or contribute to the condition.  The therapist will also discuss ways to improve sexual intercourse and gain a greater understanding of each other's needs.

SSRIs

Selective Serotonin Reuptake Receptors (SSRIs) are antidepressants that help to treat premature ejaculation.  Priligy is an SSRI that is taken between one and three hours before intercourse.  It is believed that it helps to delay orgasms because serotonin plays a part in premature ejaculation. Other reasons could relate to reducing anxiety and feeling more relaxed.

Life has many hurdles and how we approach them often determines whether the outcome is happy or sad.  Premature ejaculation is embarrassing, frustrating and a passion killer.  Many relationships crumble because of an unsatisfactory sex life.  Don’t let it ruin your life - take control and do something about it.

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